Failing: In life people will try to make us feel bad or shame us for failing but the truth is that everyone has failed at something at some point in their life.
Failing as a motivation, the important lesson to learn from failing
I remember failing in school. I knew I was going to fail from the beginning of the school year anyway as my dad had persuaded me to do something I wasn’t interested in.
My dad wanted me to major in science because he wanted me to become a Nurse and my brother a Doctor so me and my brother can work together in the future.
My dad had his kids future planned according to his dreams for us. He wanted my older brother to do business too so he could help him with his business.
Even though my dad had his plans for us, and I suppose he meant good. My dad is a great dad, he wanted us all to win. He has done everything humanly possible to make this happen.
I think a lot of parents struggle to understand that children will have to grow up and choose their own paths rather than going through the path they want for us.
However, as I grew older, I realised that I liked different things other than what my dad liked for me.
For example, as much as I enjoyed my Biology lessons, I preferred Economics because it is something I was naturally interested in learning about both at school and outside school.
I am very passionate about selling and negotiating. I have been selling since I was five years old and I have been negotiating to buy my barbie dolls around the same age too.
Everything I’m passionate about is business related, I really couldn’t have or imagine myself now doing something else.
My dad loved negotiating and he always ended up winning against the sellers.
I guess that is where I got it from. I enjoyed the battle so much I would look forward to after church on Sundays when my dad and I would go shopping to listen to him negotiating with the traders.
As my dad was mainly the bread winner of our family, we mainly spend a lot of time on Sundays together apart from our early morning conversations on my way to school when he would drop me off or our 5 am wakeups to voluntarily help with his accountancy work. My dad always woke up early in the morning to get some work done before he would begin to get ready for the office.
I have learnt about balancing accounts since I was a little girl. I knew a lot about businesses including running and managing a business.
Now as much as I would have loved to be a nurse to help people, I hate seeing people in pain and I don’t like seeing blood, of course I’m not talking about the period blood (yes us females bleed at some point in every month of the 12 months a year).
I realised that being a nurse is not the best option for me. I can always help people in other ways, for example, working with a charity to help people in need.
I failed in form 3 (year 9) when my dad insisted I should major in science. By now, I suppose some of you might have understood why I failed if you have been following the story line. But for those of you that are just joining now, I failed because my dad persuaded me to do something that I had no interest in doing personally. I just did it because I had to listen to him at the time and do what he wanted me to do.
But after falling that year, everything changed. I promised myself that I definitely know what I want in life and I will always listen to myself when it comes to making certain decisions especially when it comes to study and work.
This was a very important time in my life. I cried, I felt ashamed, I locked myself up in the room. I spent so much time to myself, learning about myself and reflecting.
My dad would try to make me feel bad for failing but one day I just found a voice from somewhere and I told him that if you didn’t persuade me to do science, I would not have failed in the first place, so stop blaming me when in actuality, you are the one to be blamed.
Give me the opportunity to do what I truly want to do, and I will never fail at school again. He listened and I was given the freedom to do what I wanted to do in school.
Since then, I promised myself I will always follow the path I want to follow. Today, I am a very happy person because most of the things I do, I enjoy doing.
I am not ashamed of failing because I strongly believe failure is a message.
Thank you very much for always showing me so much love.
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